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Tracy Cain R.I.P.

April 12, 2007 permalink

John Dunn reports the death of a mother who was in regular contact with her daughter in foster care until CAS hardball tactics separated them. The despair of permanently losing her daughter drove her drug abuse, leading to her death.

In separation cases like this, it is easy to overlook the fact that uniting mothers and daughters can improve the mother as well as the daughter.

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Dear List Members,

I have been informed recently that a person I used to work with, who was an excellent fighter for her daughter, but who at the time was subject to the restrictive CFSA, has passed away. Her daugther was placed in a foster home while the mother was involved in a rather unfavourable situation ending up in a two year prison situation.

As a result of her two years in prison, her daughter went into foster care, and was in a good home. After her sentence, she worked, stayed in Narcotics Anonymous and became very deeply involved in running the program, organizing dances and other activities in NA.

She kept clean, worked full time and was doing well for herself while dealing with personal matters but keeping clean. She had ongoing visits with her daughter who was in a good foster home for four years when the CAS started to reduce her visits.

The visits were being reduced in order to promote adoption. (Still unsure of who was seeking adoption at the time) but the foster home was excellent at keeping the family in touch. Then, the CAS told the little nine year old girl at the time that she would be seeing her mother for the last time.

The mother was trying to get a visit around Christmas a few years ago when the CAS was refusing to allow it. We went on a campaign to attempt to stop the CAS from preventing a Christmas visit with her siblings and mother. The campaign involved a poster which, if they did not allow the visit, was going to be spread far and wide and postered all over downtown. The Poster read "CAS Keeps nine year old girl from her mother and siblings at Christmas against her will" and provided numbers to call at the CAS to have the public privide their opinion on the matter.

Fortunately, the notice to the Society was effective, we did not have to go on the campaign. The CAS offered her on the phone "Just this time". They had the visit, which resulted in a great picture on a site I will link to later.

Sadly, after that, the pressure of permanently losing her daughter pushed her back into the underground and there she stayed until January 2007, where she unfortunately passed away from a blood disease, I think caused by drug use.

If the mother and daughter had of at least been able to keep in touch, especialy since the mother was supportive of the foster home and the open relationship they all had maintained between each other, this now thirteen year old girl would still have a mother who loved her unconditionally.

We are not even sure if the girl has been made aware of the fact that her mother has passed, but I will be updating the list on the events as they come to be. This girl is now adopted, so is no longer the subject of a court proceeding or hearing, therefore making the following link to her web site made by her mother three years ago exempt from the secrecy legislation in the CFSA.

More will follow, since the mother's parents have informed me of the fact that her ashes have yet to be burried and I will discuss options of who might be able to visit or not during this ceremony, and if we will be making it a public affair or not.

Also these grandparents have not been able to maintain contact with the girl since her adoption. (3 years?) The CAS is even blocking Christmas cards etc. and are going to contact Kim Craitor, an Ontario MPP who has Bill 8 2005 in first reading status. This bill is to give grandparents a right of access to grand kids during custodial matters. (CAS as well I think)

I will follow up with more, this is just an emotional response letter to the list, more detailed and organized information will be provided on the web site later.

The internment ceremony willl be held this month some time we believe.

You can see how happy the girl was to be with her mother (front row on Mom's lap smiling widely in obvious happiness at being with her mother on her last visit at the CAS of which the mom fought for and won) tracycain.tripod.com

I would like to ask everyone to please take a moment to remember this image, for it is important that we realize how much their relationship meant to each other.

Sincerely,

John Dunn
The Foster Care Council of Canada
www.afterfostercare.ca

Michelle, Eric and Melissa with mother Tracy Cain
Michelle, Eric and Melissa with mother Tracy Cain

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